HRT QUESTIONS: IS THERE ANYTHING TO SUGGEST THAT SOCIETY’S ATTITUDES TO WOMEN AT MIDLIFE ARE CHANGING?
Attitudes to physical beauty still seem harsher for women in their middle years than for men of the same age. We are so geared to youth, and youth is so tied up with femininity and sexuality, that once you reach menopause you may be viewed as ‘past it’.
The environmentalist and anti-nuclear campaigner Dr Helen Caldicott, whose marriage of twenty-six years broke up on the eve of her fiftieth birthday, says blinkered attitudes do not help. ‘In the eyes of some men, older women . . . have lost almost all value when they reach menopause because their hormones are no longer at the level they were before.’ Dr Caldicott has achieved a new beginning and a sense of liberation and independence since moving out of the family home, to settle first on the north-east coast of New South Wales and then in Gippsland, Victoria. ‘Doing it released me and made me understand the strength I had.’
Women actors complain that few challenging roles are available once they reach about forty-five. While men such as Sean Connery, Sam Neill and Robert Redford still play romantic leads into and beyond their fifties, women are rarely seen in such parts. Genevieve Picot, who played the role of the obsessive Celia in Proof and is deputy federal president of the Actors Equity section of the Media, Entertainment & Arts Alliance, says she is frustrated about being considered ‘old’ in the industry. ‘The irony and the disappointment for me is that as a performer I’m feeling much more confident and my skills are so much better than they were ten or fifteen years ago, yet I just don’t have the opportunity to use them very much.’
The highly regarded SBS newsreader Mary Kostakidis believes women themselves must make the first move. She refuses to dye her greying hair because she sees no point in camouflaging the maturity and complexity that come with midlife and beyond. ‘As a younger woman I was often attracted to older men because of these sorts of qualities. And now that I’ve arrived there myself, I’m not about to cover up the fact.’
She says that women presenters on Australian television are still largely ornamental. ‘It’s boring. We are an ageing population, and decision-makers who cannot accept this and act accordingly are behind the times. In many cultures older women assume positions of great status and respect. Australian women also have pride in their years. The time must come when they are no longer discarded for no other reason than their age. If not — if our institutions don’t reflect our values — our democracy is a farce.’
Women throughout Australia are, like Mary, Helen and Genevieve, asking questions, getting information, and deciding what is important for them at midlife and beyond.
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Tags: Hormonal